6:00am

6:00am

SO, here I am swirling around in my own thoughts, trying desperately to drown in the humming of my computer as it struggles to cool down the CPU and the faeries that are used to run this machine; Of whom i affectionately call Betty, but with that aside the pressing matter spills fourth in this semi- dairy/blog-esque(?)/rant/sob.

And here we go...

It happened, after much discussion and well poking and prodding. "It" happened. One of my closest and dearest friend finally became the "Mrs" to a guy. Though the kicker is that I was the one who was supporting her/him/them, and damn straight why shouldn't I? Firstly he makes her happy, and feel good about herself. He talks to her and he listens properly. He's tall and white and blah blah blah, You get the drift. So I'm happy for her.

.....but i must confess, it hurts, unbearably so. A pain i thought wouldn't come, couldn't come. I mean i too have found another but still, it hurts......Maybe its because of my selfish desire to have someone i can dance with, talk and laugh freely with, and someone who sorta accepted me without my farces. It was nice, but because of that, that i clung on so long...too long

And now i feel i am alone, and like a child i didn't want to face what was there for me myself, i not ready......but alas when are we ever?

Heh well this kinda sucks, my plans for the next week of fun have been well shot down.

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If you are reading this, then you know this is how it has to be. This is how it is because i want you to succeed and have what i couldn't give you, I am and will always be friend. Goodbye and I wish you all the best